So awesome? So strong? So beautiful? So intelligent? So undervalued and unappreciated?
All of these questions would make for great headlines. But you wanna know the searing question that seems to be burning through the very fabric of “America”? …”Why are Black women unable to get and KEEP a man?”
(O_o) You mean to tell me in the middle of a recession, multiple natural disasters and children starving all over the world, that the only thing you can find to talk about is why the hell black women are single? Seriously?!
There have been a multitude of “credible” sources trying to point out the reason for this and apparently the newest culprit for the problem is….*drum roll please*…the Black church. I didn’t read the article, because quite frankly I think the entire conversation is a waste of mental capacity and I refuse to allow such garbage to be embedded in my psyche. But feel free to read it and tell me what you think.
But when this article was brought to my attention this morning (via Twitter) it lowkey pissed me off. I swear, everybody from Slim Thug to Steve Harvey has something to say about the Black woman and why she’s so screwed up. One minute every one is in an uproar because we are “too educated” and outnumbering Black men in higher education. The next minute, we’re lonely, desperate and looking for a man to give us value. #cantwinforlosing
THEN it dawned on me…
Like seriously! Who is really to blame for this so-called “singles crisis”? One of my Facebook friends (and Spelman Sister’s) seemed to offer a valid answer to the question.
My point is this…the institution of marriage as a whole is in a crisis and it is not racially specific. However, if it were racially specific I’m not sure we are the ones that people need to be asking all the questions about. This is nothing more than yet another attempt to weaken the foundation of Black America and attack what’s left of the family structure in our community. Personally, I feel that the message these articles and “experts” are trying to send is…SETTLE. “Take what you can get and be happy with it. You’re asking for too much and that’s why you’re single.” It causes you to do one of two things: 1) Question your standards and ultimately accept less than what you deserve OR 2) limit your OWN potential in order to secure the man who doesn’t feel threatened by what you bring to the table. I’ll pass on both!
Being single is not the end of the world. I’m not saying that we don’t desire companionship, nor am I saying that every woman’s approach to dating is perfect and therefore should have a man. But even if you never get it right or find the right person, the ultimate goal in life is to be happy with YOURSELF. So if I should happen to be single for the rest of my life, as long as I’m happy with myself, who cares what your panel of “experts” have to say?!